Dear Diary,

I have been languishing on this shelf for the past 175 days. I have seen waves come, I have seen waves go. I have seen shelves reset, and I have seen shoplifting. And yet, and yet, I still remain.


so whats this, i thought i was illustrious
the chosen one retail sales are trusted with
where's the slip man theres somethin that you musta missed
you're in the midst of the one with the buster fist
see my feature list, well you ain't reachin this
got a voice box, yeah you know i'm teachin the kids
my catchphrases amaze be peepin the vids
and tie-ins i'm tryin to make you each so pissed
that you ain't find me, is what i'd like to say
i might display, behind me, what you'd like today
while i fight decay, you look at other toys
buy me, the warranty says you will enjoy
for ya brother buy another ain't no other choice
beg ya mother i can hover and distort your voice
they call me log, i'm fun for a girl or a boy
and drumming up interest like Mike Portnoy

hey you, embrace consumerism
it's new!, it's got what you've been missin
that too, commercials on so listen
please do, collect the new editions
(hey kids), i suppose that there is minimal assembly
but hey, would you look at the phenomenal accessories


we know, that you want to buy us
we know, that we're most desirous
we know, seen the advertisements
we know, spreadin like a virus
so if you like to spend, then we can play pretend
buy up all my friends, it's the latest trend
do you comprehend, then break out the 10s
when the repaints hit, you can buy em again
you can't avoid me, or my brethren
see the shopping cart and one of us is gettin in
it's time part with the cash flow don't be sweatin it
whatever you came for best to be forgettin it
it's my damn time, and thats plain to see
i get what's mine, someone's gonna play with me